About Julie Lively – Certified Alcohol-Free Lifestyle and Sobriety Coach
My story is less about a rock bottom moment, and more about a nagging rock bottom feeling. I was health-focused, driven and accomplished. I had it all figured out except for this one thing. I felt fantastic taking breaks from wine but continued to fall for its empty promises. My morning green drinks and daytime spinach smoothies kept giving way to chardonnay at night. I wondered why. What was wrong with me? I felt so much better when I didn’t drink!
Changing my relationship with alcohol has provided unsurpassed clarity, calm, and has energized me to live my life fulfilled and free.
Trying to Find What Was Missing in My Life
This rock bottom feeling was two decades in the making. I stepped away from my high-paying corporate career after September 11, 2001 when that horrific, life-changing event stirred me to refocus my time and energy. It was a big transition; however, I became filled with the purpose and energy that comes from being a stay-at-home mom. My two sweet kids were my full-time mission and wine became the way to relax and unwind from the chaos of the day. I just needed that little bit to take the edge off.
Two more kids and several years later, my husband and I split up. I drank to numb the sadness and anger of my marriage dissolving, fear of my future as a single mom with four kids, and the loss of the social life I had once enjoyed as a couple. And sometimes I drank simply because I could. There was always a bottle of LaCreme chardonnay in the fridge.
Mommy wine culture? Yep! It got me too. I bought into it hook, line and sinker using my beloved chardonnay to relax, celebrate and connect.
Let’s not forget that our culture says alcohol is fun! It’s at the core of all social events. The boozy singles’ dating scene is attractive and cool. Wine was the key, or so I thought.
As the social gap between my daughter with Down Syndrome and her peers became wider, and as she aged-out of summer camps and after-school activities, her exclusion and isolation led to mine. I recall exactly when I began indulging in that extra glass. Didn’t matter how I felt the next day – we had little going on anyway.
As my nest started to empty, my life did as well. I placed others first for so long, I lost sight of who I was and what I wanted. I saw the world moving forward, but my self-worth suffered and the choices I made kept me stuck. I remember sitting on my couch drinking wine, wondering if this was how it was always going to be.
I needed to slow that train down.
Breaking the Cycle and Becoming Alcohol-Free
I did a Dry January, went 45-days alcohol-free and felt fantastic. I eased into drinking and was back to where I started in no time; feeling that awful alcohol-induced 3am anxiety, puffy bloat, and next day 5pm cravings.
I read all the quit lit, tried more dry challenges, strung many days together and then “failed,” diving deeper into shame and wondering what was wrong with me. I thought I was a typical drinker, and wondered why was this so hard to stop. Did I have a problem? That scared me.
I had to figure this out for once and for all. I promised myself I would only drink on weekends, but even that was too much. The less I drank, the worse I felt when I did. It just needed to stop. I had a lot of knowledge and tools but didn’t know how to pull it all together.
So I hired a coach and joined This Naked Mind’s PATH program.
Within 18 months, I was fully alcohol-free and double certified through This Naked Mind’s coach training institute and Jolene Park’s Gray Area Drinking certification program.
Changing my relationship with alcohol has provided unsurpassed clarity, calm and purposeful energy. Are you ready to live your life fulfilled and free?
Let’s Do This!
Alcohol-Free Lifestyle & Sobriety Coaching
My approach is through education, compassionate inquiry, connecting conversations, and healing grace. You will learn how to feel, heal and deal to become free from where alcohol holds you back. This is so much more than not drinking. It’s all about Living Lively and Free.